Always Putting Others Before Yourself? 8 Signs To Tell It’s Too Much + What To Do

Selfish or selfless?
Selfish or selfless?

Are you always putting others first, even at the expense of your own wellbeing?

While being kind and considerate is commendable, it’s important to remember that you deserve to take care of yourself too.

In this post, we’ll explore the dangers of constantly prioritizing others over yourself and show you how to set healthy boundaries.

From burnout and resentment to low self-esteem, we’ll leave no stone unturned in our quest to help you take care of yourself.

We’ll also provide practical tips and strategies for learning to say “no” and putting your own needs first without feeling guilty.

So, grab a cozy blanket and get ready to learn how to prioritize your own wellbeing without sacrificing your kindness and compassion.

You deserve to be happy and healthy, and we’re here to help you achieve that. Let’s get started!

When Putting Others Before Yourself is Good:

Putting others before yourself can have a positive impact on your life experience. Here are 6 reasons why:

1. Increased satisfaction with life: By focusing on others, you can gain a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction that comes with helping and making a positive impact.

2. Improved emotional and spiritual health: Caring for others can improve your emotional and spiritual health by promoting feelings of empathy, compassion, and gratitude.

3. Opportunities for unmitigated communion: Putting others first can lead to deeper connections and relationships with those around you, fostering a sense of community and belonging.

4. Reduced depressive symptoms: Helping others can reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety, as it shifts the focus away from negative thoughts and feelings.

5. Increased meaning in life: Being an others-centered person can give your life a greater sense of purpose and meaning.

6. Positive life outcomes: Studies have shown that people who prioritize others tend to have better relationships, higher levels of happiness, and fewer negative life outcomes.

By adopting a self-sacrificing attitude and putting others first, you can develop essential life skills and become an individual and community preparedness champion of change.

Whether it’s volunteering in your community, participating in the amateur radio community, investing in local businesses, or getting involved in faith-based communities…

There are countless ways to become a caring person and make a positive impact on those around you.

It’s important to note that putting others before yourself doesn’t mean neglecting your own needs entirely.

Maintaining a positive attitude and balanced relationship with yourself and others is key.

Selflessness is a form of compassion, but it’s important to prioritize your own well-being as a priority a well, together helping others whenever possible.

If one does not take care of themselves, they cannot take care of others. This is a reminder of the need to think about oneself and to tend to the needs of ourselves so we can be better for others. This the definition of healthy selfishness. If one does not take care of themselves, they cannot take care of others.

Source: Harvard Business Review

When Putting Others Before Yourself is “Too Much” for Your Wellbeing

While being an others-centered person is a noble trait, it’s important to note that there are times when it can be detrimental to your wellbeing.

Here are some instances when putting others first can be harmful:

  • When you neglect your own needs and desires, leading to dissatisfaction with life.
  • When catering to people becomes your biggest priority, causing you to neglect your own relationships and responsibilities.
  • When you become a people-pleaser and lose your sense of self, leading to a negative impact on your emotional and spiritual health.
  • When you take on too many volunteer opportunities and lose balance in your everyday life, leading to unmitigated communion and depressive symptoms.

It’s important to remember that being a caring person doesn’t mean sacrificing your own happiness and wellbeing.

It’s essential to maintain a positive attitude and balanced relationship with yourself and others.

Putting others first should be a form of compassion, not a self-sacrificing attitude.

There are times when it’s okay to put yourself first, and it doesn’t make you a bad person.

Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Take care of yourself, and you’ll be better equipped to help others.

8 Red Flags Selflessness is Compromising Your Wellbeing

Being an others-centered person is a noble trait, but it can be taken too far.

Here are eight red flags that indicate your selflessness is compromising your wellbeing:

1. You are always exhausted and have no energy for yourself.

2. You feel resentful towards the people you are catering to.

3. You have no time for your hobbies or interests.

4. You feel guilty when you say no to someone.

5. You neglect your physical health and self-care.

6. You have become a doormat for others to walk all over.

7. You feel like you are losing your sense of identity.

8. You are experiencing depressive symptoms or negative life outcomes.

If you identify with any of these red flags, it may be time to reevaluate your approach to life. Being selfless should not come at the cost of your own wellbeing.

It is essential to maintain a balanced relationship between caring for others and caring for yourself.

Remember that putting yourself as the second priority does not mean that you are a wrong person.

It means that you are taking care of yourself so that you can continue to serve others.

Self-sacrifice is a form of compassion, but it should not be the only form.

You need to find a way to balance your desire to help others with your own needs and wellbeing.

How To Focus More on Your Happiness (Without Being Selfish)


So, are you tired of putting everyone else’s needs before your own happiness?

It’s time to prioritize your own wellbeing and start living your best life. 

Here are 5 simple steps to help you focus more on your happiness and create a more fulfilling life.

Step 1: Identify what makes you happy

Take some time to reflect on the things that bring you joy and fulfillment. Is it spending time with loved ones, pursuing a hobby, or achieving a personal goal? Make a list of these things and prioritize them in your life.

Step 2: Set boundaries

Learn to say “no” to things that don’t align with your priorities and values. This will help you create more time and energy for the things that truly matter to you.

Step 3: Practice self-care

Make self-care a priority by engaging in activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul. This could be anything from taking a bubble bath to going for a walk in nature.

Step 4: Cultivate gratitude

Take time each day to reflect on the things in your life that you’re grateful for. This will help you focus on the positive and cultivate a more optimistic mindset.

Step 5: Take action

Don’t just dream about your ideal life – take action to make it a reality. Set achievable goals and take small steps each day towards achieving them.

By following these five steps, you can start focusing more on your happiness and creating a more fulfilling life.

Remember, you deserve to be happy and it’s never too late to start prioritizing your own wellbeing.

So, what are you waiting for? It’s time to get going, click here to learn more on ideas where to start from.

How It Worked for Me

Until my early 30s, I used to be a chronic people-pleaser, always putting others’ needs before my own.

I thought that this was the key to being a good friend, partner, a family member and employee.

But over time, I realized that this mindset was actually making me miserable.

I found myself constantly exhausted, resentful, and unfulfilled.

I was so focused on making others happy that I had completely lost sight of my own happiness.

It wasn’t until I hit a breaking point of burnout that I realized something needed to change.

I started by taking small steps to prioritize my own wellbeing.

I learned to say “no” to things that didn’t align with my values and started setting boundaries to protect my time and energy.

I also made self-care a priority, engaging in activities that nourished my mind, body, and soul.

It wasn’t easy to break the habit of putting others first, but over time, I started to notice a shift in my mindset.

I felt more empowered and in control of my life. I also found that when I focused on my own happiness, I was actually able to show up as a better friend, partner, and employee.

Now, I make a conscious effort to prioritize my own happiness each day.

It’s not always easy, and there are still times when I slip back into old habits.

But I know that by putting myself first, I’m creating a more fulfilling and joyful life for myself and those around me.

Conclusion: Often Putting Others Before Yourself?

In conclusion, prioritizing your own happiness is not selfish – it’s necessary for a fulfilling life.

By taking small steps to set boundaries, practice self-care, and cultivate gratitude, you can start focusing more on your own wellbeing without sacrificing your kindness and compassion.

Remember, you are not responsible for the happiness of others.

While it’s important to be kind and considerate, it’s not your job to fix everyone else’s problems.

By learning to say “no” and setting healthy boundaries, you can create more time and energy for the things that truly matter to you.

At the same time, being compassionate and helping others is still important.

You can still be a good friend, partner, and employee while prioritizing your own wellbeing.

In fact, when you’re happy and fulfilled, you’re actually able to show up as a better version of yourself for those around you.

So, don’t be afraid to put yourself first.

You deserve to be happy and fulfilled, and it’s never too late to start prioritizing your own wellbeing.

By following the tips and strategies outlined in this post, you’ll finally forget living in autopilot mode. You’ll begin a more joyful and fulfilling life while still helping others and being compassionate.

Can We Help? Speak To An Online Therapist Now

For immediate assistance, contact a specialized therapist to learn more about your situation and receive empathetic support.

Because of the lower cost, better convenience, and flexible scheduling methods, more people are turning to virtual therapy platforms like BetterHelp to seek treatment for mental heal concerns.

Via the site, you may make your own schedule and pick between phone, video, and live chat sessions.

In addition to the advantages of online counseling, you may find it to be more beneficial than in-person counseling.

According to one study, 71% of participants favored internet-based therapy approaches over traditional ones, and some reported improved quality of life and symptom reduction.

Get matched with a therapist online.

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